• About

Katie Mahoney

~ Learning to Flourish

Katie Mahoney

Tag Archives: living life

Feelings… we humans are not the only ones with them

18 Monday Nov 2013

Posted by katielifewise in Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

burdens, family, God's tenderness, gratefulness, living life, love of family, Murphy's law, overwhelm, personal growth, purpose, stress

woman screaming download       I’m feeling it today.

We always hear “when it rains it pours”… Another Murphyism I suppose. You know I like Murphy ~ well maybe not like; make that, relate to.

The burdens start to come and seem to pile on bit by bit. My toaster broke last week… if you can call completely melting a child’s beefy plastic spoon in it as broken (I should KNOW better – always look inside things before using them when there are curious grandkids on the prowl). Now the iron burned out yesterday – literally went up in smoke unprovoked (we use this every day – I mean, it was a nice one, with the retractable cord).

Finances have been a challenge with a transition in jobs. Not sure what is going to happen with our health insurance. I have a lot of homework to do that is very technical, read: difficult, for me, trying to squeeze it in here. But those are such tiny minuscule things compared to the burdens that I’ve been feeling for actual people.

Such as my dear friend whose husband is in a prison being brutalized for his faith… not just any prison, but a deadly Iranian prison, where the whole family faces the very real possibility that if God doesn’t intervene they may never see him again.

And another very precious friend whose husband was so burdened down he just took his life; now the family is left behind with so much pain – they will definitely not be seeing him again this side of earth. And while they have the assurance of the love of God in his life and knowing he is now safe, they live with the dreadful burden of that memory that only a sovereign God can heal. I didn’t sleep much last night.

Just got the word this morning that yet another friend’s husband is dying from stage four cancer, and she is struggling with many things and would like prayer. There are simply no guarantees in this life

I’m concerned about my husbands new health issues, my one daughter’s particular on-going health struggle with nursing her baby, my other daughter’s pregnancy and sleep challenges, and another daughter’s stomach issues and life transition that need some serious wisdom and care. Been praying and helping, deeply concerned for a niece that was desperately trying to adopt a daughter and get the house ready for all their requirements against a boat-load of odds, another niece facing possible surgery, and a nephew in life challenges.

It’s all on my mind and in my heart, just like your burdens are in yours. We carry these.

Life happens. And it brings with it many challenges. Many, many challenges! It’s called H U M A N I T Y.   And we will be dealing with this until we leave humanity for the supernatural state of eternity in heaven. Not that there aren’t also great things here on this earth, but wow, I’m really looking forward to that release without the tragic human experience.

But these really hard experiences do actually have their place – and their point. They shape us, and we have a quite a big part in the way in which we will be shaped by our response. When I was trying to type in “brutalized for his faith” it kept auto-correcting to “fertilized for his faith”… I was getting frustrated and kept telling it NO! (as if it can hear me).  But maybe God was trying to speak to me through that annoying little feature that makes up some ridiculous word exchanges when I don’t want them (even that can be used by God – He’s so creative!).

We ARE being fertilized for our faith… things are put on us that can make our faith stronger and grow bigger, more visible and useful. Things that feel like uh, crap…and well, death. “Unless a seed falls in the ground and dies it won’t bring any fruit”….

With that, I am in the middle of preparing a workshop for a woman’s conference, on stress. 😉 Talk about living it. I guess that’s a good thing to have real empathy, not that I needed it – I already knew!

Thank you, dear Lord Jesus, that you know ALL that, even better than I do. You could have just come down one day fully grown, a perfect untouched human specimen and sacrificed Your life that way. But You deliberately chose to live here on this earth, and You walked where we walked in the frail tent of human flesh, blood, and emotion – feeling, suffering, desiring, loving ~ experiencing that tragic human experience. You get it.

Ohhh. So that’s why You did it.  I can relate to YOU even more than Murphy. ❤

Getting old and dirty railings

31 Saturday Aug 2013

Posted by katielifewise in Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

Aging, aging gracefully, antiques, body image, full life, living life, self-worth

So you’re getting old? Great… That means you should be worth more than ever!

By the warailingy, I am so old that I actually had to stop in the middle of what I was doing, cleaning, so I could write this down or else I would never remember.

So here I was, outside scrubbing off all the dirt buildup in the crevices of my outdoor colonial style porch railings (which incidentally was not on my checklist for today… so of course I then immediately added it to my check list, and checked it off. This is very important because it makes you feel like you’ve accomplished more…like, combed my hair, check/ cross off).

Not entirely off the subject but, did those early colonial settlers from England have to make this intricate pattern for their porch rails? Couldn’t they have come up with something easier that we didn’t want to imitate 300 years later? Now I can see the relationship between English muffins and English architectural railings… Look at all those nooks and crannies. What were they thinking? You don’t even get to take advantage of them on railings, with amazing wells of melted butter pooled up ~ so what good are they? Hotbeds for green and black moldy stuff.

Anyway, back to my back-breaking work.  As I was cleaning off lots of dirt and grime in the crevices of the areas that were carved out and molded, it occurred to me that this actually looks sort of like “antiquing.” This is something we like to do to furniture and building designs to make them look more beautiful… You might pay a lot more for something that’s beautifully painted with antiquing in the crevices. My “new” kitchen cabinets have this.  Hmmmmmmm…

That’s weird. Something that 200 years ago they would’ve been out there cleaning and scrubbing away just like me (and trust me, this dirt and grime on my porch did not take 200 years to get there- I wish!) many, many years later we call a beautiful antique. And we try to re-create it too – on purpose.

I actually kind of love that. But why is it that we don’t feel the same way with human beings? As we get older with our beautiful lines and age spots IE: antiquing, WHY isn’t that considered more beautiful and more valuable?

I’m annoyed by this thought. Mostly because I’m getting all of those beautiful lines and age spots.  And, I do love my elders, in addition to being disgusted (ok, jealous) of Hollywood types who have all that expensive re-surfacing work to take away their antique look.

We have become a culture of youth worshippers, thinking we should never, ever actually get old looking.  In fact the worst part is that in many cases, our insides could be in terrible health and crumbling, and what is advertised to us in glossy print that we simply MUST have, is some life changing technique or cream to take away our surface lines.

Ladies and Gentlemen: we are going to get old. Feeling. Moving.  And yes, looking.  I know that 50 is the new 30, and 60 is the new 40 or 35, or freakin’ 25 or whatever. But it’s inevitable.  I don’t like it either, but why do we fight it so hard?… Is it because that’s what we are being taught and sold day in and day out?  Our worth is based on our ageless beauty and trying to keep up with the dewy skin of teenagers – who ironically have NO CLUE they have the amazing porcelain stuff –  for the rest of our lives?  It’s really stupid and non-sensical, but in our brave new world of fast everything, instant media exposure (and over-exposure) and constant voyeurism into the lives of the rich and famous, it’s the rules.

It shouldn’t be the rules.  I always knew this of course, but until you are “faced” (hehe) with it yourself, it might kind of elude you.  I’m much deeper now that my lines are deeper.  I have a greater understanding and true respect for my aging mother when I can clearly see myself in her struggle to remain independent and get around without falling.  It certainly doesn’t matter how she looks ~ she’s beautiful to me, from the inside out.  That’s what I want, and sometimes it seems aging gracefully is almost a lost art.

So in the end, since I’ve stumbled upon all this wisdom of how wonderfully valuable antiques are, why am I cleaning the dirt off? Why don’t I leave it for the antiquing look?… Somehow it doesn’t seem right for a porch to be genuinely scuffed, moldy and marred (unless you deliberately and permanently do some kind of crafty artwork to make it that way) when it was only built several years ago… It’s only good if the house was built in like 1782, even IF it’s been cleaned most years since then and the dirt and grime that looks rustically beautiful is probably from 1972. Or maybe even 1992.  Actually, make that last year.  It’s not fair, but that’s the rules. 

So then, did I do a really thorough job of cleaning every little corner? No, of course not. I want to preserve the integrity of my growing antique… I think I will just tell people that on this former Civil War battleground area, my house was the only one that was here, built in 1798.

Okay. So that probably won’t work. No, definitely.

But I could tell them that I salvaged this incredible railing from an antique house. There you go.  This is going to save me many years of cumulative work. Which is a good thing, seeing that I. am. getting. old.

Seriously ~ trapped in my little brain, I still feel like I’m 20 something, young at heart, exuberant about the future, passionate about life, with maybe just a pinch more of wisdom thrown in.  So, just like the railings, I’ve gotta take care of this shell that carries me 🙂 .

A Short Take on Love…

09 Friday Aug 2013

Posted by katielifewise in Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

gratefulness, living life, love, love of family, Murphy's law, traffic

SHORTSdownload

“ In these bodies we will live,

In these bodies we will die,

Where you invest your Love,

You invest your life…”
                               Mumford & Sons

I smelled like a sweaty little boy who’s been outdoors running around the neighborhood all day, playing hard.  I don’t mean to sound sexist here, but it seems to me that little boys have a different “playing” chemistry. I know because, even though I only have daughters, I remember my brothers coming inside after a robust day of romping when I was little.  No offence guys, but like, ew.

When I left the house in the relative cool of the morning I had decided to take the vehicle that had the broken A/C as opposed to the air-conditioned stick shift.  I knew there was probably going to be traffic jams, so hating to have my foot on and off the clutch I made a choice. Whoops.  That heat index into the 100s escaped my calculations.  I often seem to be plagued by Murphy’s Law.

As I was driving on I-95 stuck in traffic, my heart was racing in the blistering heat, my little car fan turned up to the max blowing out hot air from the abyss. I questioned if that was really helping, as it pretty much felt like I had the heat on full blast.  But I figured some air moving was probably better than the sense of suffocating.  Now I know what my convection oven does.

My left arm was in the blazing sun from the open window on that side and I could see I was going to get sunburned as I traveled for the next hour, or two or three, who knew? Construction.  Orange cones.  Lots of trucks merging in.  And FRIDAY!

Luck was with me, however, because I had just been to get a bone density scan and these lovely little shorts they had me wear I had decided to keep.  I had said to the technician, “You’re just going to throw these out, right?  Is it ok if I take them?” she agreed they’d definitely be thrown away in that trash basket right in front of me.  I couldn’t see her face from the other room, but she was probably feeling sorry for me and shaking her head, with a “what the?” look.  I pulled the little accordion door open to the waiting area to see several women sitting there waiting, who comically stared up at me having heard my request (it’s in a tiny trailer – everyone hears everything! Who knew the previously empty waiting room was now full since I had finished?).

Don’t ask me why. I’m sure there would have been no use for them at home. You know, the kind made out of that crunchy blue disposable fabric used in Medical facilities? We women are well acquainted with them from our many humiliating GYN appointments.  So now, faced with a one arm farmer’s tan and more age/ sun spots which I religiously try to avoid adding since I have enough already, with some quick thinking I did what any self-respecting middle-aged woman would do… I put the useless pair of shorts on my arm…

I’m sure I looked like a loser to everyone who was driving around me.  I don’t know which was worse for my ego – moving along or sitting still.  If we got going at a good clip my wild unkempt hair and big sleeve were billowing out the open window in 90- something degree heat.  If we were going slow or hardly at all they could see my actual face (I tried to look all casual and cool… “Like really, I love the heat~  I’m doing this by choice!”)   Every lane I struggled to move over into of course became the slowest lane. You know. (Where is that Murphy dude… If I ever find him, I’ll…!)

I pondered as I rolled along, on the overwhelm I had been feeling – of all the things I needed and wanted to get done, and I remembered this little episode was just that.  Very little.  So many are hurting – deeply.  So many are truly suffering, and there is a lot of pain, sickness and tragic loss, not to mention those in the world who are literally just trying to survive.

I was, just barely, above the gale force winds coming in my window (ok so I’m exaggerating) listening to a Mumford & Sons CD to wile away the hours and these lyrics were sung.

“ In these bodies we will live,

in these bodies we will die,

where you invest your Love,

you invest your life…”

Wow.  I think I always kind of thought of it the other way – where you invest your life you invest your love.  But really what we’re investing – or should be – is our love.  That should come first.  That should be our motivating factor for everything we do.

I then remembered this amazing song by Sara Groves, “Without Love I am Nothing”.  It is a wonderful inspiration, as well as a jolting wake up call… If you are feeling a little frustrated with life and the overwhelm I invite you to take a listen to this song and be reminded of what’s really important.  We may not have everything the way we want in life, look perfect, and be doing it all right, but it’s our motivation that counts the most.  Listen to this as you read the rest…

Sara Groves – Without Love – YouTube

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WJoqSQG0D60

‎Love.  Love for people~  love for my family, friends, and those I try to help…love for the God I serve and want to follow in His ways the best I can.  And simply the love for life. We have so much!  And I know it.  What is your motivating factor?

I walked into the house and plopped myself down on the cool couch and dumped my scattered armful of disheveled items down next to me, including my makeshift sleeve pants….  Those goofy little things had really turned into a shelter and a blessing to me.

Relieved and grateful, I said with a true recognition of my riches, and the love in my life: “Lord, thank you for keeping me safe on that treacherous Murphy’s road.”

What are you becoming…?

18 Monday Feb 2013

Posted by katielifewise in Uncategorized

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

full life, living life, personal growth, purpose

It’s been said that “every day we are becoming what we love.” What do you love? Whether you realize it or not, you are becoming the thing that you think most about and that most consumes what you choose to place your attention and affections on.

It might be, say for instance, your children or family…if you really love them deeply and devote much of your life to them you might be becoming a great parent or grandparent that is selflessly devoted to helping them become the best person they can be, giving them what you believe is what they need.

But what if my attentive “love” for my children is more selfish and is really, deep down, about how much they will love me back or be thankful for all I’ve done for them… so that it becomes more about me, than them? Then I am becoming a controlling, self-focused person, setting myself up for disappointment and possibly bitterness. My motivation is wrong, and the outcome will not be positive.

The point is, my repeated actions have consequences, and I will become that thing that I ‘do’ (we do what we want and ‘love’ ultimately) over and over. Without realizing it. Without even meaning it. Maybe, without actually even wanting it! So if it’s not good things that I’m doing over and over and over – yikes, what do I do about that??! I’ve got a problem!

“Repeated actions form habits.

Habits form character.

Character is making me who I will be for eternity.”

Who do you want to be? Or more exactly, who do you want to become? Our character – the ‘who’ we are – is constantly changing and growing… into something. It can be better, it can be worse. It’s really your call. But if you are not deliberate about it, you’re just going to become whatever is “happening to you”, and wherever the tide of your life is taking you.

We all have hard times and difficulties in life – some harder and much more difficult than others. And yet, it’s amazing to see how the same situation can affect two people so very differently. You see, because it’s their call. We have a choice in our responses.

Sure some reasons for our responses are genetic, and perhaps the way we were raised, and maybe even partly due to our current body chemistry with hormonal changes and physiological imbalances or sickness, that’s true (which is also why we need to work on those things for the WHOLE life!… but we’ll get to that too). But it’s only when we truly take responsibility for our actions and the way we think that is influencing our actions, that we can begin to make a change and actually see where we need to start heading.

It may take some time, but we all can change! I do believe in a supernatural God, and the power of what He can perform in a life that is beyond what we simply determine to do… but that doesn’t mean we all need 3 mysterious visits in the night from the Spirits of the past, present and future like Scrooge, to change! 🙂 It’s a process for 99.9% of human beings, so take heart, that probably means you.

And as far as I can see with the eyes of faith (and if you don’t have the same eyes of faith I’m not here to judge you… but I might ask you to simply consider the challenge of faith) I believe that process includes the amazing Hand of a loving, creative, all-wise God, Who wants to help you – He is just waiting for you to ask and cooperate with Him.

What a relief that we’re not in this alone. We’re all here together, needing each other. What hope! What promise for a future that you are going to love to become…

Recent Posts

  • The Heart of the Matter with Confederate Statues
  • Yeah…OK, I’m a little crazy
  • Happy Birthday, America! May you last, because we kind of forget. A lot. [A 4th of July Post]
  • Tick-Tock… the game’s NOT locked
  • Feelings… we humans are not the only ones with them

Archives

  • August 2017
  • April 2016
  • July 2015
  • February 2015
  • November 2013
  • October 2013
  • August 2013
  • June 2013
  • April 2013
  • February 2013

Categories

  • compassion
  • Cutting edge health research
  • health
  • open mind
  • out of the box
  • Uncategorized

Meta

  • Create account
  • Log in
  • Entries feed
  • Comments feed
  • WordPress.com

Blog at WordPress.com.

Privacy & Cookies: This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this website, you agree to their use.
To find out more, including how to control cookies, see here: Cookie Policy
  • Subscribe Subscribed
    • Katie Mahoney
    • Already have a WordPress.com account? Log in now.
    • Katie Mahoney
    • Subscribe Subscribed
    • Sign up
    • Log in
    • Report this content
    • View site in Reader
    • Manage subscriptions
    • Collapse this bar
 

Loading Comments...